Expert Counsellor Talk About Self Sabotaging- By Navleen Sethi

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Self Sabotaging- A Major Roadblock to Self Awareness

Many a times when we think of pursuing something big in our life, we often get distracted before we even start of making a goal-sheet on how to work collectively towards our goals. We begin to encounter certain patterns of our behavior which we have formed from our previous styles of doing things, more precisely called- “Habits”

Consciously we pretend to be sagacious and mindful of what we do and how we perceive things happening around us but when its the time to show sagacity and wisdom under the actual circumstances our subconsciousness gets clicked and we tend to show up the same behavior patterns which we have formed subconsciously without us realizing. People more often make decisions depending upon their subconscious decision patterns.

We tend to reveal certain characteristics of our personality which we have developed subconsciously. For e g: How do we manifest what we fear? The answer to this is, when we fear something, we repeatedly play it in our mind. And thus make the unknown familiar. Now that it has become familiar, we find comfort in it, over the unfamiliar. Thus subconsciously we gravitate towards it and manifest what we fear. Self Sabotaging is one such behavior pattern.

Did you realize lately that your mind has a tendency to attract negativity over positivity, comforting over hard, easy over right and so on. Our mind tends to get more flighty and inclined towards what we make it learn and adapt to. Self Sabotaging is a sort of behavior or thought patterns which sets you back and prevent you from doing what you are willing to do. It’s quite common for self sabotagers to lead themselves to adapt to unfavorable behavior patterns like Disengagement, procrastination, self doubt, guilty, shame, unworthiness, making excuses, Getting close to a goal then quitting , jumping into arguments and losing boundaries. The person gets victimized to become a self sabotaged personality and tends to show similar behavior both in his personal and professional front, thus blocking his way to manifest his realistic goals. Sooner or later we need to realize that self sabotaging can leave a detrimental impact on our personality and can harm us in numerous ways. Develop habits that support the behaviors and achievements you want in your life, and when you do find yourself undermining your own goals, call yourself out.

One of the most effective way to deal with self sabotaging is to become self aware of your thoughts and emotions. If you don’t acknowledge it, then there’s no way for you to deal with it. Explore the underlying feelings and what’s causing them. That’s when you can begin to find the people, resources and solutions you need to stop the painful cycle.

Here are certain positive affirmations and ways to unlock your true motivation, Harness your willpower and get out of your own way:

  • I will not stress over things I cannot control.
  • When I hit the bottom, the only way to go is up.
  • Suffering brings meaning to life.
  • I am strong and resilient.
  • I am capable enough to achieve anything and everything.
  • I accept what has happened and by accepting, I start to heal.
  • I will get through this.

The only way we can stop self sabotaging ourselves is by doing what’s right for us to do, embracing our own journey, becoming our own reason for an applause and criticism, developing productive habits, rule of thumbs for decision making, practicing acceptance and self care.

Hope this helps in awakening any single form of your subconscious behavior pattern and directs it towards the right path.

Published By

Navleen Sethi & Anudev Singh

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